Bizarre Fashion Designs That Prove Beauty Is In The Eye Of The Beholder
There’s a fine line between being a fashion victim and a fashion survivor. And you’re not going to want to be on the fashion victim side of the line. If you call the fashion police, they can only really take down your complaint and file paperwork, but there’s not much they can do about it without any fashion evidence. For that reason, most fashion crimes go unsolved, and sadly, a lot of fashion crimes go unreported.
You’re about to click through a slideshow that’s full of fashion victims. But just because they’ve been involved in a fashion crime doesn’t mean it needs to take over their life. They can learn from the experience and grow and maybe also take off that outfit and burn it so nobody ever wears it again.
Finally! Designers are finally thinking of how to design clothes for women who have an eyeball for a head.
Of course, you put a fashionable hat on the eyeball head, so it looks like an eyelid.
And then you draw attention away from the eye head by bringing it down towards a pair of lips skirt. That way nobody will be wondering why this poor girl was born with an eyeball for a head and how does she see.
The Bees Knees
Ah, yes. It’s the “swarm of bees clouding around your head like they’re attacking you” look!
This look is going to be all the rage this fall. You won’t be able to spit without running into a woman wearing this headpiece.
Of course, it might be hard to tell which woman is wearing this headpiece and which woman has a swarm of bees attacking her face. And that means someone who needs to be saved from the bees might not be.
If you love being with your significant other so much that you never want to be separated from them, don’t worry.
There’s an outfit for you and your boo boo, and it kind of makes you look like a baby.
It’s a onesie that’s meant for twosies to wear, or possibly even threesies if you try really hard to get a third one in there. And also if you can manage walking in this weird, yet fashionable outfit.
The Bird Cage
Sometimes you try to be so fashionable that it cages you in to strict beauty ideals.
And sometimes fashion literally cages you in inside an actual cage that is meant to cage models and not to cage birds.
But that’s why models are so skinny. If they ever find themselves wearing a fashion cage, they can just turn sideways and slip through the bars. And you thought it was because so clothes drape on them in a more flattering way!
Check And Mate
Who doesn’t want to wear a dress that makes them look like a human chess piece in their everyday life?
When you’re such a fan of the game, you want to live it in your everyday life.
It brings the game we all known and love to life, even if you don’t know how to play chess. You can run up to people and shout, “Checkmate!” at them really loudly. And everyone wants to have that experience.
Snakes. Why’d it have to be snakes? No, seriously. Why did this designer have to make a dress that looks like snakes?
It looks like if Medusa had never been able to get a haircut in her life.
Seriously, if this is the future of fashion, we want to stay in the past. It’s safer that way. There’s no risk of our dress coming alive and giving us a snakebite. Those can be poisonous and very risky!
Um, excuse me, Miss. You might not have noticed, but it seems as if a creature has crawled up inside your dress and taken a bite out of it?
Oh, we’re so sorry. That’s not actually a creature?
Oh, that’s just your leg? Your leg is shaped like a tongue, and this designer created a dress with a cut-out so that you could show off your tongue leg? Sorry. Yeah. That makes a lot more sense now.
Some designers like to put animals on their fashions. It’s not uncommon to see a dress with a bird on it.
But making a hat look like a jellyfish has to be some kind of fashion first.
We could totally understand if it was a hat with cherries, or with flowers or with ribbons. We could even understand if it was a hat covered in birds. But a hat made to look like a creature that can sting you?
“Uhhh. We have all of these leftover balloons from your birthday party. What are we going to do with them?”
“Hear me out a sec. What if we made them into a dress? That way we wouldn’t have to throw them away.”
“You’re a genius! Everyone is going to want to wear this, plus we save money on having to buy fabric because we’re just putting a balloon on a model and calling it clothes. This is brilliant!”
“I had an accident just before the show started. I don’t think I can go on.”
“Of course you can. What happened to you? Oh my god! You fell through a table and now it’s stuck on you!
“It doesn’t matter. It’s fine. Just go out there and walk the runway, and nobody will notice that there’s furniture hanging off of you. If you walk with confidence, all they’ll notice is your positive attitude and that will be good enough.”
“Hey, so maybe next time we plan our collection, we don’t let our grandmother design an outfit.”
“You caught me. I didn’t have time to design anything this season, so I just asked my nana to knit something for me.”
“Well, we definitely noticed that you did that. Grandma made this exact same outfit for everyone in the family and gave them out as gifts for Christmas. I’m literally wearing mine right now. Can’t you see it?”
When you’re a kid and you refuse to go anywhere without your teddy bears, and then you grow up and you still refuse to go anywhere without your teddy bears.
You can always incorporate those teddy bears into a jacket and then wear it outside and hope nobody notices.
And if you really want to go all out, you can make that jacket out of your old childhood blanket. And then you’ll never have to let go of your youth.
“Oh my god, this model has three sets of eyes! How did we not notice this when we cast her?
“It’s okay. It’s okay. We can work around this lets cover it up by… uh… putting three sets of sunglasses on her.
“And then we’ll make her carry a bag, and nobody will think she has three sets of eyes, because what person with three sets of eyes would carry a bag like that? No one would!”
When you’re an astronaut, but you still want to look fashionable when you’re in space, you can rock this look.
The bright patterns of the space helmet hide the fact that you’re wearing a functional piece of equipment.
And the form hugging spacesuit will show off your figure, even if you’re in deep space. As a bonus, this space suit has pockets! So you don’t need to carry a purse if you ever venture out of the spaceship.
“Okay, if we didn’t make any clothes, but we just drew an outfit on a piece of cardboard, do you think anyone would notice?”
“No. Absolutely nobody would notice. That’s pretty much the same thing as wearing a dress.”
“Okay, good. Because I already did that and put it on a model and sent her out on the runway. I did it as an ‘ask for forgiveness not ask for permission’ thing, but it turns out you like it.”
I woke up like this. No, literally. I woke up like this. Exactly like this.
I didn’t roll out of bed to come here. I rolled up with my bed. I took the whole thing with me because I didn’t want to get out of it.
I was being lazy, but it actually took a lot more work to turn my bed into a dress, and then make it stand up so I could walk than I thought.
Play It Again
There’s only one thing that could top the piano key necktie. And that’s the grand piano dress.
The two can be worn separately. Or the two can be worn together to let the whole world know, “I play the piano.”
The only danger with wearing this dress is that people are going to walk up to you and try to play you. So if you don’t want people coming up to you and putting their hands on your keys, don’t wear it.
Give Me A Hand
If you’re wearing this outfit and you ask someone to shake your hand, you’re going to have a hard time.
They’re going to grab the wrong hand at first. And then they’re going to be there all day trying to figure out which one is the right one.
It’s better to just skip this look and wear an outfit that makes it obvious which hands are your hands. You don’t want to make it awkward with people.
“Do you think my zipper looks big, or is it fine? Be honest, because I’m staring to feel self-conscious about it.
“Are you sure it’s okay? It doesn’t draw too much attention to it? Because the last thing I want to do is wear a zipper that looks to big.
“I mean, if it doesn’t look good and I get made fun of, I can always zip my head up inside my outfit. So that’s the plus point.”
Wrap It Up
We don’t even want to know if these are fresh condoms or if they’re used condoms.
Because while we all love the idea of recycling trash, recycling used condoms to make a dress would not be a good idea.
And also, it would take a lot of time to collect that many used condoms to make a dress. Unless you’re on tour with a rockstar. And then you’d get that many in one day. They’re rock stars!